November 28, 2005

How we been doin?

Hello again. I live in Brooklyn now. It’s difficult to know where to start:

The waning of the honeymoon?

The problematic kidneys-might-be-malfunctioning test that turned out to be a false alarm? (The repeat test was normal.)

The hideous first NY primary-care doc visit, endured in order to get my monthly B12 shot? (My mouth is still hanging open, and it’s been weeks since I saw this guy. Actual quotes, delivered after a 1-minute discussion of my diabetes: “You aren’t type 1; they just described it that way because you were insulin dependent at diagnosis. A common confusion. Do you really like that insulin pump? New Yorkers don’t generally use them. How many units a day does it give you? It depends on what you tell it to do? Hmm. So you really don’t mind having that in your stomach? No, you don’t need to see an endocrinologist. You can visit me three times a year and that will be fine.”)

The name of Charlotte’s successor? (Nellie.)

Every time I thought about writing here about any of the above (or any of the myriad other tiny golden diabetic moments of the last 3 months) I felt so freaking tired I wanted to cry. And fairly often did.

Sometimes it helps to write and to put my writing out into the world; sometimes it makes me feel more trapped than ever. How diabetic am I? Enough to write about it every day, every week? Every few weeks? Never again?

Well, all that sounds (a mite) darker than I actually intend. A gentler explanation for my withdrawal is simply that it’s been a preoccupying few months, pulling up roots from my old home and trying to take the first steps toward replanting them here. It’s a complex, exciting, stressful process, and I can’t say I’ve done the greatest job with regard to Things Diabetic. The self-care hasn’t been a disaster on the whole, particularly considering the honeymoon complexities, but my eating has gone to hell and I’m only now trying to start exercising a bit again. Etc. etc. We know the cycles well. I’m at the beginning of an upswing, I think/hope.

Okay. There’s my start. Meanwhile, I have a lot of blog reading to catch up on...More to come here when I seem to be feeling Just Diabetic Enough.


  1. I don't know about that doctor wanting to make such drastic changes on the first visit. I'd get a second opinion if I were of luck!

  2. Hi Darrell, thanks for the comment. I was probably way too subtle above in describing my reaction to this doctor. What horrified me about him is that I clearly knew much more about my diabetes than he did, yet he had no clue this might be the case. He was incredibly arrogant. Not only will I take none of his advice, I'll never see him again.

  3. V,

    I'm so glad you're back.


  4. Hey, good to see you back! And welcome to Nellie. I hope she's treating (or dosing) you well.

  5. Violet,

    I've missed you-- and have wondered often about how you were doing. I'm so glad you're back.

    But you know, I can understand the need to pull back for a while, too. You've got a lot going on out there...

    Take care, and post when you can :)


  6. I used to read your blog before your hiatus, glad to see your back. I'm adding you to my list of blogs that need to be added to the OC:

  7. Hey Violet!

    Thanks for the support! I've enjoyed reading your latest stuff, and like everyone else here am very glad that you're back online!

    Sounds like things are going Ok for you in your new surroundings - lots of adjustments and challenges, but I think you are doing very well.

    We'll talk more soon!